Does this shirt make me look gay
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I'm gonna be a star, son.
- Cindy Campbell: Why are you doing this?
- Bobby: Why? Why? You hear that, Ray. I think she wants a motive.
- Bobby: Did Scream have a plot?
- Ray: No.
- Bobby: Did I Know What You Did Last Summer make any sense?
Oh-ho-ho!
- Old Man: [annoyed] Excuse me?
- Brenda: Uh ha...
you made love to me.
- Ray: First of all, you sucked my...
- Bobby: Whatever!
- Buffy Gilmore: Hey do you think the press is gonna wanna talk to us?
- Brenda: Oh please. You know, the one where Shaq plays a genie.
- The Killer: That's not a horror movie.
- Drew Decker: Yeah, well, you've never seen Shaq act.
- Deputy Doofy: Mom said that when I wear this badge you're supposed to treat me like a man of the law.
- Buffy Gilmore: Yeah, and Mom also said for you to stop sticking your dick in the vacuum cleaner!
- Shorty: Yo, man.
Hah! Oh I am scared! Oh, this is some scury shit! You handle 'dat!
- Young Man: [shouting] Will you shut the fuck up!
- Brenda: [takes out a camera] Um-umm! I spill blood on the walls, then play tennis with your balls. Peace!
- [camera pulls back to reveal all of Shorty's friends dead]
- Shorty: Yo!
That was the illest rhyme I ever seen!
- Cindy Campbell: You guys are psychos! You've watched too many TV shows!
- Ray: No! Watching TV shows doesn't create psycho killers. I'mma have a heart attack! It's like I seen all this shit before.
- Cindy Campbell: They had a killer at you high school, Shorty?
- Shorty: No, it was in that movie- Scream.
Such lovely tits...
- [Buffy rips the crown and flowers out of the previous winner's hands]
- Buffy Gilmore: Give me my crown, bitch.
- Beauty Pageant MC: [singing] ... He grabs his head] D'oh!
- The Killer: Okay,okay close your eyes!
- [Cindy closes her eyes, and the killer tries to hide under the carpet, but then goes behind the curtains]
- The Killer: Now do you know where I am?
- [Cindy opens her eyes]
- Heather: The First Amendment gives us the right to say what we want.
- Teacher: Oh, shut the fuck up.
- The Killer: What's your favorite scary movie?
- Drew Decker: Kazaam!
You lying! This is all me up in here! She loves 69...
- [a woman hurls a vase of flowers at Buffy, knocking her offstage]